My dick is so big that it has its own blog

2008-02-21T12:00:00.000-06:00

My dick is so big that you may not speak to it unless spoken to first.

DREW CAREY WEDNESDAY!

2008-02-20T12:00:00.002-06:00

#64. My dick is so big, that right now it's in the other room fixing us drinks.

(Drew Carey)

2008-02-19T12:00:00.000-06:00

My dick is so big that the bank threatens to foreclose if I miss a single payment.

2008-02-18T12:00:00.000-06:00

My dick is so big that I use it to surf the big waves.

2008-02-15T12:00:00.000-06:00

My dick is so big that although it's uptight, nobody calls it anal.

2008-02-14T12:00:00.000-06:00

My dick is so big that it doesn't have to call ahead for reservations. Even today.

DREW CAREY WEDNESDAY!

2008-02-13T12:00:00.001-06:00

#100. My dick is so big, it has an agent. My dick's people will call your people. Let's have lunch with my dick.

(Drew Carey)

2008-02-12T12:00:00.000-06:00

My dick is so big that most people believe it took steroids.

2008-02-11T12:00:00.000-06:00

My dick is so big that it donates both time and money to charity, but not just for the tax deduction.

2008-02-08T12:00:00.000-06:00

My dick is so big that it promises to create jobs.

2008-02-01T12:00:00.000-06:00

My dick is so big that it'll attack if you make eye-contact.

2008-01-23T12:00:00.000-06:00

My dick is so big that buddhists can no longer explain nothingness.

2008-01-22T12:00:00.000-06:00

My dick is so big that my foreskin is often confused for a burkha.

2008-01-21T12:00:00.000-06:00

My dick is so big that theologians don't believe it was created, it just is.

2008-01-10T12:00:00.000-06:00

My dick is so big that it has backup singers.

DREW CAREY WEDNESDAY!

2008-01-09T12:00:00.000-06:00

#99. My dick is so big, it charges money for its autograph.

(Drew Carey)

2008-01-08T12:00:00.000-06:00

My dick is so big that it's an impediment to middle east peace talks.

2008-01-07T12:00:00.000-06:00

My dick is so big that the fire marshall limits its occupancy.

Merry Christmas

2007-12-25T12:00:00.000-06:00

My dick is so big that I string lights and hang tinsel on it for the holidays.

(plus, I wrap presents and place them around the balls)

2007-12-21T12:00:00.000-06:00

My dick is so big that you can retire early if you just recruit two friends, each of whom in turn recruit two friends...

2007-12-20T12:00:00.000-06:00

My dick is so big that it's only open to accredited investors.

2007-12-19T12:00:00.000-06:00

My dick is so big that even direct deposit takes 7-10 working days.

2007-12-18T12:00:00.000-06:00

My dick is so big that it has offshore accounts.

2007-12-17T12:00:00.000-06:00

My dick is so big that it maxes out its 401(k).

2007-12-06T12:00:00.000-06:00

My dick is so big that a team of surveyors annually revise its acreage.

(NOTE: GPS is only accurate to within 3 meters and therefore insufficient for this purpose.)

DREW CAREY WEDNESDAY!

2007-12-05T12:00:00.000-06:00

#47. My dick is so big, I have to cook it breakfast in the mornings.

(Drew Carey)

2007-12-04T12:00:00.000-06:00

My dick is so big that it's no longer allowed to compete as an amateur.

2007-12-03T12:00:00.000-06:00

My dick is so big that historians estimate it took 100,000 slave workers over 20 years to build it.

2007-11-15T12:00:00.000-06:00

My dick is so big that it genuinely cares about the less fortunate.

DREW CAREY WEDNESDAY!

2007-11-14T12:00:00.000-06:00

#13. My dick is so big, there was once a movie called Godzilla vs. My Dick.

(Drew Carey)

2007-11-13T12:00:00.000-06:00

My dick is so big that it's required to conduct evacuation drills.

2007-11-12T12:00:00.000-06:00

My dick is so big that it affects the tides.

2007-11-08T12:00:00.000-06:00

My dick is so big that it still receives sunlight at night.

DREW CAREY WEDNESDAY!

2007-11-07T12:00:00.000-06:00

#28. My dick is so big it hit .370 in the minors before it hurt its knee.

(Drew Carey)

2007-11-06T12:00:00.000-06:00

My dick is so big that it has an opt-out mailing list.

2007-11-05T12:00:00.000-06:00

My dick is so big that you have to dial 9 to get an outside line.

2007-11-01T12:00:00.000-05:00

My dick is so big that even the NRA agrees it should be closely regulated.

(But my dick doesn't kill people. People kill people.)

DREW CAREY WEDNESDAY!

2007-10-31T12:00:00.000-05:00

#9. My dick is so big, it was once overthrown by a military coup. It's now known as the Democratic Republic of My Dick.

(Drew Carey)

2007-10-30T12:00:00.000-05:00

My dick is so big that it's on the no-fly list.

2007-10-29T12:00:00.000-05:00

My dick is so big that wildcatters use it to drill for oil.

2007-10-26T12:00:00.000-05:00

My dick is so big that Amazon.com's #1 best seller is My Dick for Dummies.

(#2 is O'Reilly's My Dick in a Nutshell)

2007-10-25T12:00:00.000-05:00

My dick is so big that it has an open-source API.

2007-10-24T12:00:00.000-05:00

My dick is so big that it regularly releases updates to its firmware.

2007-10-23T12:00:00.000-05:00

My dick is so big that it requires an adaptor to use it with most interfaces.

2007-10-22T12:00:00.000-05:00

My dick is so big that it only runs on Unix.

(and it runs Doom!)

2007-10-18T12:00:00.000-05:00

My dick is so big that the Astros needed a ballpark with a retractable roof, just in case.

DREW CAREY WEDNESDAY!

2007-10-17T12:00:00.000-05:00

#57. My dick is so big, it has its own dick. And even my dick's dick is bigger than your dick.

(Drew Carey)

2007-10-16T12:00:00.001-05:00

My dick is so big that Congress is called to testify in front of IT.

2007-10-15T12:00:00.000-05:00

My dick is so big that it has a 1-800 support line.

2007-10-12T12:00:00.000-05:00

My dick is so big that it runs on 220V.

220, 221. Whatever it takes.

2007-10-11T12:00:00.000-05:00

My dick is so big that it needs a parachute to go limp.

DREW CAREY WEDNESDAY

2007-10-10T12:00:00.000-05:00

#2. My dick is so big, I went to The Viper Room and my dick got right in. I had to stand there and argue with the doorman.

(Drew Carey)

2007-10-09T12:00:00.000-05:00

My dick is so big that it's on a 3,000 calorie diet.

2007-10-08T12:00:00.000-05:00

My dick is so big that it looks blurry unless you stand WAYY back.

2007-10-05T12:00:00.000-05:00

My dick is so big that its proprietary formula is a closely guarded secret.

2007-10-04T12:00:00.000-05:00

My dick is so big that it has to take the service elevator. By itself.

DREW CAREY WEDNESDAY!

2007-10-03T12:00:00.000-05:00

#90. My dick is so big, it can chew gum.

(Drew Carey)

2007-10-02T12:00:00.000-05:00

My dick is so big that the Japanese refused to sign a treaty outlawing its slaughter.

2007-10-01T12:00:00.000-05:00

My dick is so big that it's got meetings scheduled all day.

(Submitted by badbeth)

2007-09-28T12:00:00.000-05:00

My dick is so big that Dale Jr. in the #8 Chevrolet Budweiser car can draft behind it.

Praise the tiny baby Jesus.

2007-09-27T12:00:00.000-05:00

My dick is so big that a sunroof isn't an option, it's required.

2007-09-26T12:00:00.000-05:00

My dick is so big that the state requires it display license plates and undergo emissions testing yearly.

2007-09-25T12:00:00.000-05:00

My dick is so big that it beeps when I pull out.

2007-09-24T12:00:00.000-05:00

My dick is so big that I'm required to carry minimum liability collision insurance.

(Note: I also have comprehensive.)

2007-09-20T12:00:00.000-05:00

My dick is so big that it can afford to ignore the polls.

2007-09-19T12:00:00.000-05:00

My dick is so big that it has protective heat tiles to avoid burning up on re-entry.

2007-09-18T12:00:00.000-05:00

My dick is so big that, every year, 8-10 people die from high altitude sickness attempting to climb it.

2007-09-17T12:00:00.000-05:00

My dick is so big that the iPhone gets poor reception near it.

2007-09-14T12:00:00.000-05:00

My dick is so big that it was nearly hunted to extinction for its valuable and highly prized ivory.

2007-09-13T12:00:00.000-05:00

My dick is so big that it sees a chiropractor for its bad back.

2007-09-12T12:00:00.000-05:00

My dick is so big that its worship is the 2nd fastest growing religion on the planet.

(But it's intolerant of worshipping other dicks.)

2007-09-11T12:00:00.000-05:00

My dick is so big that it was the #1 draft pick for the Falcons in 2001 and then it was convicted of running an illegal dog-fighting ring.

2007-09-10T12:00:00.000-05:00

My dick is so big that it dropped out of college but people still think it's an expert because it is a documentary filmmaker.

2007-09-06T12:00:00.000-05:00

My dick is so big that FedEx has to deliver it in separate shipments.

(PS: UPS sucks!)

2007-09-03T12:00:00.000-05:00

My dick is so big that the World Bank uses it to secure loans to 3rd world countries.

2007-08-31T12:00:00.000-05:00

My dick is so big that it taps it's OWN foot under the stall. But it isn't gay!

2007-08-30T12:00:00.000-05:00

My dick is so big that liberals want to blame global warming on it.

2007-08-29T12:00:00.000-05:00

My dick is so big that the Russians nearly walked out of disarmament talks with it.

2007-08-28T12:00:00.000-05:00

My dick is so big that it's often mistaken for the senior senator from New York.

2007-08-27T12:00:00.000-05:00

My dick is so big that Republicans put it in the White House. Twice.

2007-08-24T12:00:00.000-05:00

My dick is so big that the IRS flags it for audit every. damn. year.

2007-08-23T12:00:00.000-05:00

My dick is so big that the architects had to pay particular attention to the load-bearing balls.

2007-08-22T12:00:00.000-05:00

My dick is so big that it's a Category 6 on the Saffir-Simpson scale.

2007-08-21T12:00:00.002-05:00

My dick is so big that by the time you paint the tip it's time to start over again at the balls.

2007-08-20T12:00:00.000-05:00

My dick is so big that it gets 5 o'clock shadow.

2007-08-17T12:00:00.000-05:00

My dick is so big that its doctor is worried about its heart.

2007-08-16T12:00:00.000-05:00

My dick is so big that the original title for Samuel L. Jackson's film was 'My Dick on a Plane.'

"Enough is enough! I have had it with this motherfucking dick on this motherfucking plane!"

2007-08-15T12:00:00.000-05:00

My dick is so big that the only option is the turbo diesel. Hemi.